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ADVICE

AMY DICKINSON Send questions to askamy@amydickinson.com or to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068.

Dear readers: Often, readers reply to dilemmas posed in my column in ways that are helpful, useful, and inspiring. Today’s column is devoted to some of these replies.

Dear Amy: “Tell or Not Tell” wondered about disclosing the sexual abuse she had survived as a child to the man she was dating.

I had been divorced for five years when I went on a first date with a man I had just met.

On our way to the restaurant, we were stuck in traffic behind a car with a bumper sticker that said “Help Stamp Out Child Abuse.”

“Why would someone put a bumper sticker like that on their car?” he asked.

I thought for a moment before answering and said, “I suppose the car belongs to someone like me who was molested as a child.”

My date didn’t ask for more details at that moment because he was trying not to wreck the car.

I knew from his instantly shocked reaction that this was a man with whom my children would be safe, and he has been — for 37 years now.

So I vote that this woman should tell him and see what happens. What he says and does next will tell her exactly what she needs to know. — Found a Good One

Dear Amy: A reader named “Selfish” wondered when it might be too late to send or receive a letter of condolence after a death in the family.

When our youngest son was killed five weeks before his 19th birthday, we received hundreds of notes and sympathy cards.

While we greatly appreciated all of the condolences we received at the time of our son’s death, the note we got six months later was the one that stood out the most to us.

We felt extra supported to know that someone else remembered that while the world moved on, our life had been turned upside down and that we continued to be devastated and grieve the loss of our child.

For those who grieve, any time would be considered “timely” to know that others are remembering them in their loss. — Supported

ENTERTAINMENT

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2022-12-03T08:00:00.0000000Z

2022-12-03T08:00:00.0000000Z

https://daily.gazette.com/article/282548727297576

The Gazette, Colorado Springs